Top 10 tips to surviving marriage after 30 years

by kim on September 15, 2009

The number one tip (and 9 more) for surviving marriage after 30 years…

  • Be a happy person in your own right.   Having individual interests takes the pressure off of your spouse:  they don’t have to  be full time entertainment bureau, counselor, and provider of a meaningful life. Work, hobbies, other friends (not including cheating on your spouse), are all things that will bring individual happiness.  When you come home at night you’ll have something to share, rather than being a sponge waiting to soak up your partner’s love. Do this first, and then keep in mind these other tips…
  • Admit when you are wrong and say you are sorry.  As the Beatles song says, “life is very short and there’s no time for fussing and fighting my friend…we can work it out”.
  • Listen and pay attention with 100% of your mind, heart, soul and physical being. This means, no multi-tasking when its sharing time.
  • Have a good sex life (with each other)
  • An unshakable belief in love and romance aka be an incurable hopeless romantic


  • Shared goals.  When you pull together for a mutual dream, you have a reason to stay around
  • Know what “love” is to your mate, and give it to him or her.   Five main things that mean love to most people:  Acts of service,  words of praise, tangible gifts, physical touch, understanding their deepest soul
  • Leave them to wonder…have some mystery (avoid “too much information”)
  • Be unselfish:  think about being the best spouse you can be rather than how your spouse needs to shape up
  • Laugh

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